I hate this !

Why is this happening to me??
Why must it be like this??
It's totally humiliates me...

I just wanna help my friend...
Why must ask something from them???
Why? Why? Why???
Stupid !!!
>=?

Can't take it off from my mind...

I still remember this one guy face I saw at Mid Valley few weeks ago..
He's just so cute...
OMG !! He's cuter when he laugh and smile..
What a great moment I captured at that time..

His body size is kinda small, tall...
His ears is kinda big.. Heheheh...
I think he got twin brother...
Coz that other guy also look almost like him..
If he was not his twin then he might be his sibling...

But obviously that kind of guy already have a girlfriend...
It always like that...
Wish I could meet him again...
Even from far...

F**** !!!

Last night I was searching something on the internet..

Hahahah..

It was funny after we found it...

We're so nervous and excited...

Supposed she's the only one should feel that, I don't know why I feel it too..

Heheh...

Cannot tahan btul...

Today, the sky is gloomy...

Am gloomy too..

I don't know why..

I try to make myself happy but sometimes I just couldn't..

Another thing came up..

Shoot, shoot, shoot !!!!!

I hate this, I hate this, I hate this...

Why is this happening to me??

Why? Why? Why???

I'm making people around me sad and in pain..

My heart is so painful !!

The timing is always wrong...

Am always in the wrong time at the wrong place!!!

Why? Why? Why??

I'm so stressed up !!!

Life...

Life can be so harsh and tough..

Everyone's life is harsh and tough..

I don't know what to say here..

But recently so many things happened...

Although it gives me new experiences and being more mature, I just don't know what to say bout it...

It just happens like that..

Some people can tell most of their friends bout their secrets or personal life..

But I don't..

I don't know what kind of person am I...

Do I look mysterious, blur, arrogant, or annoying?

Some people said that am kinda mysterious, some said am so blur...

Haih..

I don't know..

Sometimes, I really want to tell people what or how I feel...

But I just couldn't trust anyone so easily..

Even my close friends...

Coz sometimes, when I told them, they don't seem to understand it..

Means it didn't reach my expectations for them to understand or at least give me support..

I know, we can't satisfy everyone..

But so far, I never found people who really understand me...

I mean as a friend...

True friend..

I haven't found my true friend...

I also never tell people about my family to anyone...

But it's a big lie if I never tell, I told them..

Only the surface...

A very thin layer..

If I tell, I will tell someone that don't know me or never meet me..

And tonight, i feel like i was being cheated...

Actually, it's my fault...

I don't know why am I feeling happy when being friend with this person..

I just knew that this person treated everyone just like this person treated me...

I should't have this kind of feeling..

Totally hate it...

That's why I said I don't want to trust people so easily...

Sometimes I feel so lonely..

I always stared at one part for long time...

I always think..

I don't know what am I thinking..

Bout life? Myself, perhaps...

Relationship...

They are so many relationships..

Friendship, love relationship, family relationship and etc. etc.

But what is the meaning of these relationships???

I haven't see the real meaning of these relationships thingy..

There is one or two friends of mine that kinda care of me, kinda understand me, kinda give support to me..

I just knew them here, in my new place...

Sometimes, I want to tell them how or what I feel..

But I just couldn't..

I prefer that am the only one know about it as a human...

I just can think bout it..

I have Allah...

I always think about Him too...

I always remind myself am not alone..

I have Him..

Haih..

So emo tonight...

Sorry bloggie..

I should have posted nice thoughts or experiences I went through...

Gute nacht, bloggie..

Write again some other time, when I have some time for you...

Danke..

I just don't get it...

I just don't get it why people around me are acting like this...

Hmmmph...

Last week, I told one of my group mates that I won't be able to do the terrarium at first...

Suddenly, they started to sound and try to tell that they have been pissing off with me..

Ok, fine..

I think I'm at fault, so I'll do it..

I did the terrarium thingy with so much tension...

I really feel so stressed up at that time...

And guess what...

Today, this evening, they decide to choose whose one is the best...

They asked to meet at the cafeteria..

I went there..

And guess what again...

They didn't even do the terrarium thingy..

Gosh, I thought they had done just like what I have done...

But they didn't do anything actually..

They just bought or brought the plants in a VASE !!

Can you imagine it???

I expected that they had done it just like what i did...

Gosh, I was so wrong..

And it kinda makes me feel so bad for myself of course...

They want my pebbles..

Of course I don't feel like giving them coz they ONLY want the pebbles...

I susah2 tanam pokok tu walaupun not so worth it.. =.=

Aigoo~

And tonight's problem is that I can't listen to hitz.fm which there is an interview with Tokio Hotel !!!

Fish !!

The frequency in my room can't reach..

Not only hitz but all the radio station...

S!

Gosh, I've been waiting for this...

Shoot, shoot, shoot !!!

Why is this happening to me??

First the fucking MTV WS..

And now the interview...

Hmmmpphh...

Huhu..

I'm so burning inside me right now..

Chillax...

Cool down, cool down..

>=(